Dating violence troubled love
I arrived traumatised with attachment difficulties and Mum and Dad set about fixing those.’ Then tragedy struck. It was very tricky for me and my younger brother, who was also adopted, and certainly for Mum.She had the opportunity to return us to care but she said no.’ 'In the Sixties and Seventies there tended to be more babies up for adoption.
The key to it is to keep telling yourself that you mustn’t take it personally, it wasn’t aimed at me, it was aimed at the mother and potential mothers who had let her down.’Given this type of background, it is not surprising 30 per cent of all adoptions struggle, and up to 40 per cent fail, meaning the child ends up back in care.While the couple get a £350 settling-in grant, the adoption allowance is means-tested and, says Jim, ‘doesn’t take sufficient account of any other children we have’.With so many mouths to feed, the family shopping bill runs to £300 a week.‘However, the only child who ever desperately wanted to be back with her birth mum was Lisa.We were encouraged not to give her full details about her birth mum and to tell her that her birth mother wasn’t able to look after her.She’s a bright, endearing child who went into care at the age of three.
'She was placed with two families keen to adopt her, only to end up back in foster care because her behaviour was too extreme.
He knew this 13-year-old from Grimsby - whom his casting director had found at a youth club for teenagers with "school attendance issues" - had something.
First off, he persuaded him to forswear Coke in favour of another fizzy beverage: the more expensive Purdey's. "He thought that if I drank Purdey's, it must be OK."With gentle coaxing, the rookie actor fell into a rhythm of healthier eating and living.
Jim says: ‘She pulled food out of rubbish bins to feed them, bathed them and put them to bed.’ Others had watched their siblings being hit or their mothers being hit, or they were hit.
One of the boys arrived aged eight, in nappies and unable to speak.
That was between two-hour temper tantrums that were so violent she had to be physically restrained by Jim and Sue.‘She’d be punching, kicking, spitting, head-butting and swearing and she was self-harming,’ Jim says.