Problems with dating a single father
Are both of you willing to share the parental responsibilities of your kids together? Is parenthood the only reason you are drawn to each other?
So, if you are a single woman and are contemplating a ‘happily ever after’ with a single dad, you might want to consider the following: 1.You will have to avoid rehashing old issues and drawing boundaries that may seem too rigid to allow the just involvement of the ex in all decisions pertaining to the children.If he shares joint custody, you’d have to be prepared to deal with her frequent presence.If you are a single mom dating a single dad: This scenario makes it a li’l easier to gel with each other, as there is a certain degree of tacit understanding between the parents.However, the transition from being two parents who bond over kid-talk to potential partners might still not be a smooth one.There are far too many things that you might want to consider before you take the plunge: 1.
This will be a more complex equation When you are both parents, there will be the two of you, the kids, and both your exes in the picture!
Do not judge him – he had to bribe his way into coming to see you. Children become easily attached, and you don’t want to disappoint or hurt them if things don’t work out. And even when he is spending time with you, it may so happen that the kids intercept those meetings/dates or he has to leave a date midway coz something like an A-bomb went off at his place! If you aren’t prepared to share your WE-time or cannot stand not being the focus of all his attention, then a single dad might not be the guy for you.
Also, if you are dating a single dad with full custody, you will have to be prepared for sharing his ‘availability’ with his kids. Similar situations may happen when you are romantically involved with a single dad, sharing joint custody. You have to be sure about how you fit in with his kids Meeting the kids is a HUGE step in the process. If you are serious and intend to get married somewhere down the line, then it might be a good idea to meet the kids.
Instead, if he alters his plan with them to make plans with you, THAT is a red flag.
So, if you are hearing about his kid’s science projects, his new bike or even potty-training problems, I know that it isn’t really date-talk.
Be prepared for any sort of reaction, as the kids may take well to a fun friend (they have parental figures already) but the father might not take well to your responses when he is disciplining them or you may be tagged as an evil stepmom if the kids fail to accommodate you!